Day 183 of My Prison Sentence

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This house is my refuge on most days, four walls and a ceiling keeping me safe from the sun’s rays. The light scares me now but not as much as I scare myself.

Loneliness, a constant companion, only taking his coffee break when I force myself to sleep. That’s when the changing of the guards occur. In comes the Past like some beautiful monster, tearing me down until I’m left crumbled in a ball of pain, waking to my own screams, bleeding from wounds that have never liked the idea of needles and thred, preferring their crimson red, dripping and gaping like a soundless cry.

And when Morning comes around haphazardly knocking on my door and Day grabs me from the fortress of my sheets, I spend the next eight hours fumbling in a drunken stupor without having sipped a drop of Dionysian delight.

The guards change shifts once again at dusk and old man Loneliness comes back ’round, chains in hand. The night swells as do my thoughts, my body gives out with regret and relief all at once only to be thrown into the arms of the Past. He haunts my dreams you see.  He eats at my heart every night and slowly devours my mind until there’s nothing left but a shell of who I once was.

All Hail

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After her death they called her a Queen. She was loved by all, yet she’d not always been easy to love. Not when substances blinded her and her subjects, reducing them to heartless cannibals. Their souls sold to a moment of ecstasy, kush, white lines snorted from tables, bottles drained like their bodies. Pushing back at all those who could not bare the weight of their house sigil. Nor the toxicity that had shackled them to the castle walls. I was never respected in the eyes of the people around her. I resent that. More than I can stand. I’ve lost sleep over it. I’m angry that her people who were once mine see me as a worthless beggar, a villain that began an era of hate and anger, unforgivness. I did nothing to deserve it. I could not save them from themselves and thus I am the only one who does not bare ink in the name death christened her with. For I did not know the one they named Queen. I loved and missed the girl I knew hidden deep within. The one who’d disappeared a long time prior to the reapers call. The one I once called friend. Her name now an echo in time.

The Storm (Air)

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Deep blue of the universe envelope this mind
Fill up its cracks and broken pieces, help it find
that little bit of stillness that takes away the noise
Make a once crooked thing graceful with poise
Those ragged shreds filled up with static
Those wires short circuiting ecstatic
Put them at ease, please
Allow them to sleep, the thoughts like tea to steep
Freedom comes in bouts of silent refuge
Worries nonexistent in the tongue of the wind
Blow over this wayside station,
Make clean this gasping inhalation
By way of force or pure desperation
Make it stop

Water

 

 

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Swell of the ocean building
Energy spreading like grains of sand
Giant wave of antiquity barreling towards the edge of the Earth, grand
Between shore and tide
veins of magic reside
Little glimpses behind the veil
Betwixt mist the power trails
Blood of the planet, clear to sight
Strengthen spirit, cleanse dark, make light
Liquid salt strip the aura of weight
Flow of water break stagnant state
White illuminance, protect and shield
Repel dark currents, make them yield
God and Mother guard and bind,
Shelter spirit, body, mind

 

 

All artwork was done in watercolor by Sarah Gomez for the collaboration of the Nature Series project. Follow her on Instagram: saraheliart

Fire

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Fire

Awaken from your slumber, simmering one,
Old friend I know so well and miss
Brimstone has surrounded you for far too long,
Let your anger cool like waters kiss,
I need you more than ever now to warm my frozen heart
stuck in between a beat and stuck between breaking apart
Set my soul ablaze again, let faith run through my veins
Reawaken what sleeps now, take away old putrid pain
Purify me of the darkness I allowed to chase you out
Illuminate me with your warmth, chase the snakes out
Unburden me of banked flames seeking within me release
Let your passion flow through me, giving way to peace
I know I may have locked you up in fear of burning away,
But without some fire now and then I seem to lose my way
Walk with me again, I ask you take me on your wings,
Where swords are forged to win the war and dragons always sing

 

Art by Sarah Gomez

Follow her on Instagram: saraheliart